If the world ended today, would you be proud of yourself?
Yes; one of the most valuable lessons I learned in 2012 was to just be the person I wanted to be and not the person other people wanted me to be.
While I may not have done as much on the volunteer front, open source, or Ubuntu as I would have liked; I did, however, learn some valuable lessons which included:
- To let my kids grow up and be who they are–make their mistakes, let them learn from those mistakes without shaming them or sentencing them to life-long guilt sentence (Even though I have awesome kids, they are still teenagers, and this lesson and its value to my kids is one I struggle to remember daily – I can be a bit overbearing and controlling where people I love are concerned.)
- I learned that the saying ‘do unto others as you would have done unto you’ isn’t nearly as powerful as ‘treat/communicate/interact with others as they prefer to be treated/communicated/interacted with’ (the way I wanted to be treated wasn’t always the best way, my preference isn’t others, and there is a time and place for everything, but being vulnerable enough to learn from others and do things outside your typical way of doing things is totally awesome)
- I learned to ‘mean what I say and say what I mean’. (No one is going to take control of my life and live it for me; I had to overcome the fear and just do it!)
- I learned that even after 20 years of marriage there is still a lot to learn about one another and you can never love someone too much. (My husband is amazing, but like any relationship it takes work and I hope our next 20 years is as strengthening, loving, and as amazing our first. I learned not to worry about what others think, that in the end of the day when my hand finds his and as he wraps his arm around my shoulder and we whisper, “I love you” it doesn’t even begin to express how much we really love each other.)
- I learned that it’s ok to own my ‘wounds’ and that everyone has some kind of wound. While theses scars aren’t visible to the human eye, they were experienced in my actions, felt in my touch and heard in my words. And I know at times, those like me who have these “invisible” wounds feel pain can be almost overwhelming if not dealt with. (To overcome the damage done by trama(s) I had to acknowledge those things happened, the effect those trama(s) had on me and those around me, know that I didn’t choose to have those trama(s) happen to me, they were out of my control. I had to lose the negative feelings and move forward. Even baby steps in a forward direction are steps to progress, growth, and strength – I think this will be a lifetime of coping but at least now I have those skills)
Part of the fun of finding my footing in 2012 included, hiring a trainer and working out, losing weight and adopting a healthier lifestyle. Then in August I decided to have some major cosmetic surgery, but that was only after I had spent two years dealing with the “inside me”. My physical appearance was not the first thing I worked on it was the last because no matter what I did to the visible me, it wouldn’t have brought any peace or happiness until I started being me.
The one thing that ties all my lessons back to my community involvement is being open and transparent and the value in the applying the tools and philosophies learned through open source involvement to everyday life. Learning to not be afraid to fail; asking for help, and sharing what you learn with others are great habits to develop. (Many many thanks to all my open source friends who helped me without ever knowing how empowering they were.)
On the work front my job with Linaro went from a full time contract position to a full time employee of Linaro and as such I am now its Community and Social Media Manager. The learning never stops and for that I am forever grateful.
I think I have mentioned before that I don’t like making resolutions because in the past I would set really unrealistic goals. However, in 2013, I want to actually accomplish the things on my list, I just have to make the list first More on that later. In the meantime here is my 2013 wish for everyone:
Happy New Year! May 2013 be your year to shine. May you find all the happiness and success your life can hold.
May you be surrounded this year by the love of family and the laughter of friends and a hope in your tomorrow’s.
May you find peace in all your journeys throughout 2013. Be true to yourself and don’t afraid to be who you are meant to be and not who other people think you should be. Own your successes and failures and remember the ones who matter won’t mind the real you and the ones who mind don’t matter!
As always, remember to smile – Happy New Year!!